There is loneliness, it is the “loneliness of fibromyalgia”, that loneliness that all sufferers suffer, the loneliness of living in silence their symptoms for fear of being questioned, to continuously doubt their psychological stability and end up wondering one more time …… will it really be like that, …? And will I be the cause of all my ills? Issues that in our loneliness we would like to really be like this and before so much anxiety and visititude that we have to live to be able to take the helm of our illness to be able to leave it behind.
These are the doubts of our solitude. Where am I going? what I do? who helps me? or better Who do I ask for help?
The loneliness of fibromyalgia is found in every smile we force out of fear of saying we are wrong, for fear of reproach, to statements like “you must take less medication and go out more”. Did not you go to the doctor and put you in treatment? ? “So many pills is what they have done, you have gotten used to them”, “it can not be possible that it does not effect you”.
The loneliness of fibromyalgia we live every time we are in company with our loved ones and while the pain grips us we struggle to not be the center of attention and get the day to end to be alone with ourselves and let the pain flow in tears of despair.
We feel the loneliness of fibromyalgia when we go to the doctor’s office, the specialist’s office or whatever we have to do, in that way our mind makes the landscape we passed through disappear and become one of doubts and fears face a new symptom that will remain in our body and that we will have to get used to “once more”.
The loneliness of fibromyalgia is the struggle of the day to day that we face those who suffer from this disease, which is diluted by the disabilities we suffer and our environment does not accept that it is an incapacity but becomes a “you can but do not want.”
The loneliness of fibromyalgia is the multiple conversations of who wants to know about our disease and sentences the conversation with “the pain is in our mind”.
This loneliness that we live becomes extremely painful when you notice that who is at your side speaks from the “prejudice” or from their own experience and does not admit that the world is more something beyond their own experience.
The loneliness of fibromyalgia is a loneliness that we are grazing little by little, from which one flees at the beginning (because there is no fear more voracious than not feeling loved and the affection makes the company necessary), and you struggle to adapt yourself to your environment, to your environment to your circumstances, fight by the word, acts, overcome all situations but the disease is eating all your resources and failures arrive and therefore the reproaches.
It is then when the flight of loneliness becomes necessity, need not to be continuously justifying your behavior, need to manage your strength in things that you consider a priority. Because what the disease teaches you is to prioritize your goals and manage your strengths.
The loneliness of fibromyalgia becomes a necessity for the patient, it is when they stop listening to questions that are not going to be heard the answers, is when the doubt becomes a path that you undertake with your goals and your future prospects.
The loneliness of fibromyalgia is the path that many patients walk with their truth in secret and that with their limitations they struggle to continue with their dreams …