8 things to remember if you love someone with chronic pain.

Chronic pain is a condition in which we all shrink when we listen, right? Imagine being a person who suffers pain for more than 3 months. We also know that there are many conditions that cause chronic pain, such as back problems, arthritis, migraines, etc. It is sad, but not much is said about how frequent this condition can be. Unfortunately, it is extremely common. More than 25 million people suffer chronic pain in the US UU., But a discussion of their problems goes unnoticed. Chronic pain is not only physical, it is an emotional journey. If you love someone who suffers from chronic pain, it is likely that you have to accommodate their situation as necessary.
Beyond the physical sensation of pain, here are 8 reasons why you suffer more than you think.

1. Chronic pain is invisible 
Approximately 96% of diseases are invisible, which means that they have no external signs to indicate it, such as a cane or a wheelchair. After dealing with that for so long, they no longer grimace or cry every time they feel pain. They may look perfectly well despite being in pain.
It is easy to ignore it as a disability simply because it is not seen. Therefore, your problems may be subject to statements such as “just fight through it”, which are disdainful. Chronic pain is not the same as the common cold or even a fractured leg.

2. It leads to depression
Between 25% and 75% of patients with chronic pain experience moderate to severe depression. This, in addition to being a frequent pain, means that it is very easy to withdraw and stop participating in daily activities. It puts pressure on relationships with friends and family, which in turn further reduces their quality of life. It is a vicious circle that even affects the effectiveness of pain treatment.

As Rachel Benner says, “it is important for them to incorporate structure, activities, socialization, purpose and meaning into each day of their lives.”

3. They do not know how it started 
It is possible to have pain without a clear origin or an injury that seemed to appear out of nowhere. Having a reason for an injury is useful; You can be more careful next time. More importantly, it provides closure. Without a reason, the prolonged pain becomes completely meaningless and it feels like terrible bad luck.
Bad luck should be losing the bus to work. Not years of pain.
Meaningless suffering creates questions that demand answers. However, these answers either do not exist or take a long time to discover them. Both possibilities have adverse effects on your mood.

4. Do not know if it will end 
Especially if the person is young, this causes incredible amounts of despair. They begin to wonder if they can handle pain every day for the next 10, 20 or 30 years.
Here is the trick: there may be no end. They may have to suffer pain for the rest of their lives and this becomes more real to them the longer it persists.

5. They blame themselves
There is an expectation of having become accustomed to pain after a while in the same way that one could get used to a cane. It is easy to self-criticize for not being able to do certain things you used to prefer when spending time with friends or completing work on time. Sometimes, they will want to fight the pain and, if they fail, they will blame themselves for not having worked hard enough. This can lead to self-deprecation and feelings of guilt because they can not live life at the same pace as their friends and family.

Living exactly the same life as your classmates is not realistic when you suffer from chronic pain. The expectation of doing so creates a burden for which they blame themselves.

6. They are not making a molehill mountain 
People often underestimate chronic pain. In combination with chronic pain is an invisible disease, you can often hear the phrase “do not look bad”, which becomes “can not be so bad”.
We have all suffered, but it is surprisingly difficult to imagine a pain that lasts literally every day. It may be tempting to try to motivate them by using a motivating talk, but it can lead to a guilt attack that is incredibly demotivating. It is important not to use disposable lines as “you will get over it” because it takes you away from the problem and isolates people with chronic pain.

7. It is exhausting
Chronic pain requires a lot of energy. It’s like having four punctured tires and a half tank of gasoline and starting a tour around the country.
Every activity that goes from getting out of bed to doing the dishes or waiting for the bus requires a lot of energy. As a result of this, they may have to cancel plans and end the day early. Loving someone with chronic pain means reducing it or planning more discrete events with it.

8. They appreciate your support 
Suffering from chronic pain can feel lonely and hopeless. The relationship between a person and his pain is dynamic. You can change from apathy to frustration to despair over time. These changes in life’s perspectives and pain are difficult to deal with, especially if they are consumed with frustration. The changes are unique to each person, so there is no one-size-fits-all approach.

As you can see, chronic pain is as emotional as it is physical. Having a person who simply listens and tries to understand your best can make that trip much easier.
A supportive friend is invaluable.
Your support is very appreciated!


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